All the stories are true and I am lost Bottles litter curbs and the cars have crashed Smoke rising from the revolution factory used to be seen but the fascists shut it down I used to see myself in reflections in the water, But the waters ripples now and show me nothing of the present Who’s laughing now? Me; Manically and without reason If you don't laugh you’ll cry And my eyes are red raw And my sides are split the news tells us the war is now and the war is today Send your sons and daughters cause this time it’s the last time The plums in the fridge are too soft and have started to turn Nothing to forgive I’ll forgive the sky for threatening to swallow me whole but leaving me on land in fear instead Poison is the word And violent is the silence Necks in nooses on the saddle - slap the horse to run Another bets come in We celebrate and laugh while wood louses march the street screaming out for their god And we shake our heads Knowing that the old gods are long gone Discount discount Trouble on isle three we can’t buy this bread So do we go to sleep hungry Forgive me I’m in the dark woods, many miles to go Yapper yapper yapper Just for a week or so then it’s back to work, I need to save my money For love Synthetic drugs on the weekend boys From Indian lakes and Albanian mountains Older and wiser? Until the scales tip to slow decline And I am Charlie Crying tears for Algernon in a home for those who cannot be alone Trying to remember the man I was and could have been Helicopters chasing thieves soundtrack my dreams And I just lie here awake Thinking of love to make, against my will I have lived like this I have seen the best minds of my generation settle for Mundanity Comfort comfort comfort breaking backs built of chalk And trees and flint and rizla and red string There eyes force smiles that they do not feel Their sympathy for me would be touching if it not so deadly On the 141 passing the billboard of the child who will die due to dirty water This cannot be our world we built? We built one for love and god but did we kill god when we killed ourselves? I am not the one to ask, my interests lie in lying and thinking about how sorry I feel for myself That is what you should ask me about Dead children either way You did nothing We did nothing Organ donations at a all time low Cremations at an all time high They need their eyes they say Their eyes need burning too So they can see the place beyond time I am Meursault In my cell thinking of how I got here It all happened in such small increments Always saying it would be different Howling howling off the cliff to the abyss The abyss does not howl back Or look back Or even notice And neither do I Now the donkey is in the garden I can just focus on Stroking his nose This will fill the time for a few years Until I notice the hole in the gate again in the garden Beyond the hill And wonder if that’s where Luke is? Is that where you went ? Can I join you their Because all I do is look for signs One sign - one whisper I talk and talk and talk and talk Nothing The abyss does not notice me Swimming naked in lakes filled with contaminants of the modern world I feel my skin slip off Relief - skinny at last To drown as to not hear the Empty words from every chair in the room From the pulpit and the television From the art and the artist more so From my mouth most of all Falsehood 1 2 3 4 5 6 Whose hands are these? Spread out in front of me I can trace the veins through to my brain But whose brain is this Am I locked in here with you? Are you locked in here with me? Sadly I am not, I am free to leave Which is the heaviest chain around my neck White butterfly will you land on my shoulder To set a fire in my belief Can I see time slowed down And not just the brain rot With gay rats Whos nest I have been so happy in Dance dance dance daddy Let me see you dance There's a steak for your feeble heart I don’t think I ever liked you You don't even like you Just eat up the dull brown crumbly stuff As predicted and directed Alone in the savanna and the suns going down and the hyenas are out They are as high as a kite A red kite of war Fists of bloody rage only turn to bloody regret So fast so fast they turn You would want to learn a lesson before you go but I don't’ think you would from these books you have Burn the lot of them I will not be caught reading I’m too busy Watching Waiting for my stop to come But I fear I missed it a long long time ago Mothers always know best and I have not been right yet Hospital corridors with tidal waves of bleach haunt my dreams For a decade Going back is a fantasy that I cannot indulge in any longer as I am preoccupied with worrying tomorrows Well I would if T S Elliot would shut up about cats I am trying to worry about tomorrow It’s all the rage now The fireman are coming to burn down the library But the new one is made of glass and is atop a burger king they will have quite the job on their hands The king of burgers will have to fall as well. And the people won’t stand for that Testing northern winds blister my hands and face but I am determined to climb this mountain Then vertigo kicked in Tumbling purple lights until I find myself under the table and listen to the shouting You don’t give a fuck about me he says to her Everyone who can hear this knows it to be true But why would she He does not give a fuck about himself The villain reads off their manifesto and the crowd frown and nod in agreement Very well written Very well articulated I am my skin of grime and I will not wash this away with desperate soap I will still grow Sweat on me sweat on me I want to taste your love song It saved us more than once burning hotter hotter Hotter than the distracting mushroom clouds the future's SO bright My friend So bright it's blinding Only god can make a tree but look what we can do Landfill lullabies are the future for babies yet born As below as above seems to be the move Are drugs getting better or just stronger More to the point I have not seen straight since I was 12 In the school corridor heads smacked and vision changed forever So much would change if the centipede did step on the ground elsewhere But this is the tortoise shell we are riding on It’s a brittle one but we have no choice in the matter We did not ask to see the bright lights Tumble to earth with a crash and a bang But here we are And fun is to be had I suppose. In barn sheds repurposed for dancing In tents without doors Let them all watch us at it Until we sleep in puddles just to get the heat down A constant merry go round of kick the bucket is played until who ever kicks in the hardest smashes it to pieces and erupts into starlight A low tide this afternoon Means the lonely student will have to wait to drown herself Probably won’t have the patience for it In orchids of spiked fruit the juice is the sweetest In the south of france Blazing hot sun And ice old fascists take hold Where is a guillotine when you need one Chopping fruits for cocktails in hot attics hiding from the pigs in the streets I’m so nervous I could die Let me sip sip sip and not think at all This is my solution and everyone else by the looks of things While the dogs walk the streets looking for morsels A plague on both your houses Good and bad alike, ying and yang, beer and chang A little pick me up to walk these neon streets The pouring rain has soaked through my clothes so I shall just have to walk naked It used to be it used to be remember when we say about spoke about remember when I do, i remember when that happened Would love to remember that with you Now they collect flowers and hastily try to plant them to have something to do other than look at the view But what a view it is A lovely life is a small life 6 ft deep we bury our dead 4 ft for a horse They aren't buried upright though that would be mental I wonder if they too need their eyes I might regret asking that A terrible state of affairs I find myself in again and again - bureaucratic fanatics I cannot figure it out They send me letters and emails but I’ve forgotten how to read What goods that done us anyway What lessons have been learnt Is this the best of all time ? Enough questions, the honey doesn't go off The crack rock glow never stops That is what is important I can see it in your hands when you drive your car Let it go let it go I hear you say And I say ‘yes yes no worries’ But in fact I have Some worries Some worries Coco cola and pall mall in the park looking perfect I am flat broke I am manifesting millions The new gods will deliver - shouted time and time again I am situated by the thames, river flowing through todays and tomorrows The boats and the rubbish eating robots bounce on top Underneath the silt are the bones of someone who thought they too would live forever in Irish bogs they kind of did Nails still dirty from a day of work 1000 years ago Atomically the same person at first you might think they Are strangers to us But we are exactly the same Nothing ever changes Except my mind I didn’t notice it was raining, I was too busy thinking of platitudes And thinking about bodies in the bog I didn’t notice we were starving, i was too busy thinking about the Feast we would have That's not something we shared or every will but I am not sad about it I am just a dog eating his food from a bowl and licking his lips with satisfaction They will still comfort me if I don't finish this, I know they will I’m off out tonight with my dog friends Doing dog stuff Eating blueberries and drinking puddles Dog stuff We might even sniff around the bog if the situation calls for it Beautiful hounds in the night Turn to old dogs soon enough No more new tricks for us Just difficult relationships and disappointing day to day lives But it could be worse The bridges are starting to crumble so slowly And the nationalists are jumping up and down to collapse it on dinghies already at the point of sinking They will all die together For nothing And the bridges will be rebuilt in glass and plastic It will last about a decade and then will be replaced The gaps around us are being filled in before we can ever properly look at them The sunlight being slowly blocked out but by an ever taller block of luxury flats Brilliant brilliant Progress progress progress Soon we will build on the cemetery We will build a block so high that the graves can rest atop of it and be in heaven Then we will have made it Then we will have the lives we deserve Dry your eyes mate Plenty of newbuilds coming soon And you can take your pick They will sink of course as all things do Ancient cities beneath earth after 5000 years As we do with all things we are speeding this process up Angels angels angels lift us up please The grass is greener over there I can see it Let's head that way Over fields of blood red poppies And crossing rivers of lukewarm water we can tread To reach that green green grass of home Just a bit further The horses probably won’t come any further with us I’m tired of walking already Time for sleep Sleep in caves away from the world - around small fires we built Seagulls fly from over waves to become gulls screaming out for scraps I saw a bear in the tip sleeping on a disgraced mattress It was a Sunday I am the bear Sleeping for winter to eat flowers this summer Summer fetes disrupted by the end of times I am Clare Naked in the moonlight on cold wet rocks Driven up mountainsides by fear of the valley only to be confronted with the enormity of it all And feel like a speck Sore legs with pin prick pain let me know things get smaller still My breath is gone My chest will not inflate Until I’m down the hill again I am David Wanting to be turned to a bottom feeding shellfish Because I know that’s the closest thing to me right now Alive alive alive we all are Skip around the maypole Banish the short days of winter But not for me, for you I want my days to grow shorter still I want to give it all away every last penny Every meal to another hungry mouth in the bucket so the crabs do not gouge each others eyes out while I peer in Have my organs have them all Now nobody is hungry and everybody is healthy I am jack Up the hill fetching water breaking my crown A sad day everyone agreed Back in the hospital again eating whatever muck they roll out Still starting again and again I could have just kept true then and once and it would have all worked out So much time has passed that now there is only faded and incorrect memory’s Let me grow hedgerows in my head as to compete this maze and make it fun Not just a dump of broken bottles and flags I once waved I will have to meadow my mind to keep it alive Everything indigenous to me can stay The alchemy of you is so clear to me I could spin you into gold but for me I just keep turning lead Giving myself to a god that doesn’t know me from Adam Seem like a solution but the only gods I know are all long gone Did we kill god when we killed ourselves In dusty summer fields I saw one once In the eyes of all my friends All the stories are true and you are the living proof.